April's fools

The accused kisser

OC resident and volunteer, our Bev Haut,
and nobody's fool

I peeked my head up over the garden wall, and what I saw was stranger than strange. In fact, it was foul. I wondered if it was:

a) me
b) the world
c) April Fool's Day
d) all of the above


Just consider these tidbits...

Anal poisoning.

Anal poisoning. Yes, Rush opens his as(s)inine mouth again today and warns that "if the British Prime Minister keeps 'slobbering' over President Barack Obama, he'll 'come down with anal poisoning and may die from it.'"

He just makes you so proud to be an American. Perhaps he is unaware that under Bush II, the rest of Europe (which scarcely considers the UK to be a part of it based on their unwillingness to go along with many EU initiatives -- take the Bristish pound stirling, as an example -- that the "real" Europeans can't get over) referred derisively to Great Britain as "the 51st state", and that despite Blair being a Labor Party PM. Didn't hear Rush complaining then, did you?

Didn't think so.

And, a joyful kiss on the President's cheek can result in more reader comments removed and replaced with the statement "This post violates our user guidelines and has been removed" than I think I have ever seen following any single newspaper blog post.

Let's check out those OC Register guidelines...

Comments are encouraged, but you must follow our User Agreement.
1. Keep it civil and stay on topic.
2. No profanity, vulgarity, racial slurs or personal attacks.
3. People who harass others or joke about tragedies will be blocked.

Ooh. It must have gotten pretty ugly because the ones that are left are fairly choice. Locksey says it straight from the gut with such simple, compelling force:

"This story, this experience does nothing but turn my stomach."

At least it didn't make him "barf in his mouth" as it allegedly did another reader.

Poor Debbie, who writes on the Facebook group I'm Proud to Know Bev Haut and I'd Kiss President Obama, too:

"My family and I moved to Southern California a year ago from Massachusetts. I could not believe the backlash this poor women received. We thought we were moving to a 'Blue' State." (Sic)

There should be a sign on the county limits that reads:

"No Place Redder than OC and Damn Proud of It.
The rest of you can get the hell out."

I'm afraid I'd have to do as Obamalover1, who wrote to say:

"I moved my kids out of OC because it is more racist than Mississippi"

Debbie must be thinking "There's no place like Massachusetts, there's no place like Massachusetts..." right about now, as Rush dreams of Senator Ted Kennedy 6 feet under long before President Obama's proposed Health Care Reform passes into law.

And then there's Great Britain Home Secretary Jacqui Smith's spokesperson clarifying the precise nature of the Minister's husband's pay-per-view movie selections, inadvertently claimed on her income taxes:

"X-rated is not the same as porn."

Thank you for clearing that up.

Meanwhile, her husband, quite understandably, "can fully understand why people might be angry and offended by this." Thank goodness there is still a sense of decency among us.

All of this made the actual Daily Candy New York April Fool's piece look downright tame and mundane.

Oh. And then there's the GOP budget.

I'll have to risk sticking my head up again tomorrow and taking a look to rule out answers C and D.

Or, on second thought, maybe I'll just watch my camellia get better.
....

It's time now to make Ted Kennedy's decades-old declaration reality in America

My universal health care hero,

Yes we can, and, finally, yes we will!

Senator Kennedy's remarks to the Democratic National Convention, Denver, Colorado, Monday, August 25, 2008:

Thank you. Thank you, Caroline

My fellow Dems, my fellow Americans, it is so wonderful to be here [laughter], and nothing, nothing is going to keep me away from this special gathering tonight

I have come here tonight to stand here with you to change America to restore its future, to rise to its best ideals, and to elect Barack Obama the next president of the united States.

As I look ahead, I am strengthened by family and friendship. So many of you have been with me in the happiest days, and the hardest days. Together we have known success and seen setbacks, victory and defeat, but we have never lost our belief that we are all called to a better country, and a newer world, and I pledge to you -- I pledge to you that I will be there next January on the floor of the United States Senate for me to give a great -- [final word drowned out by applause and cheering, chanting "Teddy, Teddy", laughter].

For me, this is a season of hope. New hope for a justice and fair prosperity for the many, and not just for the few. New hope -- and this is the cause of my life -- new hope that we will break the old gridlock and guaranty that every American -- north - south, east - west, young- old -- will have decent quality health care as a fundamental right and not a privilege. We can meet these challenges with Barack Obama. Yes we can, and, finally, yes we will! [Cheers, applause]

Barack Obama will close the book of the old politics of race, and gender, and group against group, and straight against gay. And Barack Obama will be a commander in chief who understands that young Americans in uniform must never be committed to a mistake but always to a commitment worthy of their bravery. [Cheers, whistles, applause]

We are told that Barack Obama believes too much in an America of high principle and bold endeavor, but when John Kennedy thought of going to the moon, he didn't say, 'It's too far to get there, we shouldn't even try.' Our people answered his call and rose to the challenge and today an American flag still marks the surface of the moon. [Cheers, applause] Yes, we are all Americans, this is what we do, we reach the moon, we scale the heights. I know it, I've seen it, I have lived it, and we can do it again.

There is a new wave of change all around us, and if we set our compass through we will reach our destination. Not merely victory for our party, but renewal for our nation, and this November, the torch will be passed again to a new generation of Americans. So, with Barack Obama, and for you, and for me, our country will be committed to his cause. The work begins anew, the hope rises again, and the dream lives on. [Cheers, applause]

You are still the one, Teddy, and I hope it won't take another 3 decades of repeating this refrain, this promise, this commitment for it to become a reality:

That every American -- north - south, east - west, young- old -- will have decent quality health care as a fundamental right, and not as a privilege.



....